(REALITY TV) BASKETBALL WIVES WEEKLY RECAP

BASKETBALL WIVES WEEKLY RECAP

Oh Basketball Wives…how I'm starting to miss the in-your-face antics.  If I am subjected to more of Evelyn Lozada's crying or Tami Roman's passive aggressive hair stroking, I may lose it.  Don't even get me started on Shaunie O'Neal's "new found voice."  Thank goodness for the cool Tasha Marbury and the kooky Suzie Ketcham or I might just give up on this mess altogether!  Who am I kidding?  I couldn't even if I tried…
Last night's episode had all of these attributes and more. Evelyn wants to placate her daughter's fears that her mother is reconciling with Chad.  She reveals that she did text Chad that day for his birthday.  She just wanted him to have a blessed day, but that's the extent of their chatting.  Sure. Evelyn wants to know if her daughter was worried about her during the photo debacle.  Her daughter basically calls her out and says she wasn't worried, and she reminds Evelyn that she totally put herself in that situation.  Preach. Am I so much on auto-pilot with this crew that I missed the fact that Shaunie was producing a play about Basketball Wives?  She thinks it will be a much needed positive spin for the brand.  She's looking forward to seeing some scene run-throughs while she's in New York City.  

Evelyn and Tasha go shopping and discuss Tasha's peace talk with Tami. Evelyn still isn't totally convinced that her friend has changed.  She's knows Tami will always be one to cut a b!tch. For her part, Tami is meeting with a life coach in hopes of getting rid of her anger issues. She knows she won't turn into Mother Teresa overnight, but it's worth a try. Tami shares with her life coach Shaunie's "it could go really good or really bad" comment regarding Tami meeting Tasha a bazillion eposides ago.  Really, VH1?  This statement is now what constitutes an entire story line? 

The girls are all gathered in the city Tasha's birthday, and Evelyn, Shaunie, and Suzie are shopping at a sex store for her perfect gift.  Keep it classy, ladies!  Evelyn refuses to entertain Suzie's jokes about the chef who bedded Tasha's husband, and she wants to find a conservative, beginner-style toy for her friend. Suzie reveals that Tasha has been stressed out by her weave bar opening.  

Who is auditioning for the Basketball Wives meets off off off off off Broadway production but Shaunie's own boyfriend?  Of course he is!  Shaunie tells Marlon that the playwright wants her to be in the play, but she's no actress (oh, really?  Could've fooled me).

However, she may be able to get him an audition, although she's never known him to be in a play.  Shaunie couldn't be more proud of her boy toy. Across town, Tasha is touring a cold, empty space that is supposed to be her weave bar.  There hasn't been much progress, and she's worried that it won't be ready before the grand opening.  

The following day, Shaunie and Tasha go shopping for outfits to wear to the grand opening of the weave bar.  A very frazzled Tasha shares her frustrations with the half-finished space given that fact that it is too late to cancel the event.  Shaunie's concern seems incredibly fake to me, but I can't say I'm shocked.  Tasha reveals that she asked her assistant who she needed to head butt to get things finished.  Oh no she didn't!  When Shaunie acts slightly offended, Tasha explains that she wasn't even thinking of it in the Evelyn context.  Shaunie isn't convinced.  If Tasha had said who did she need to punch/bitchslap/kick in the a$$, that's one thing, but joking about head butting crosses the line.  I don't quite follow Shaunie's logic, but then again, when have I ever?

Tami and her oldest daughter arrive in New York for the weave bar opening and Tasha's birthday party.  She wants to get her daughter's advice on her nail polish line.  Tami believes her daughter is her mirror image (goodness, I hope not!), and Lyric advises her mom to name some polish colors after those closest to her.  Tami is excited that her daughter is proud of her latest business venture instead popping off at everyone in her vicinity.

All the women are lunching together for Tami's annual "say it to my face" meal.  Tasha shares that the weave bar is coming along much better than she expected, and Evelyn dives right in to Shaunie's infamous comment. Shaunie explains that it wasn't her intention to plant any seed of negativity with Tasha, and Tasha shares that she always planned to get to know Tami for herself. Shaunie tells the women that she thinks they both have similar smart mouths, and she wanted to make sure everyone was minding their Ps and Qs at their initial meeting. Tami just wants to live in her positive new love and light and forget her violent past as she sports a #teamtami tank.  

Evelyn is happy that everything is settled, but when Tami keeps rambling, she does the unthinkable and puts up her hand.  Gracious, haven't we all learned never to put up a hand anywhere near Tami's face?  Tami immediately jumps up from the table and tries to instigate Evelyn into a fight before Shaunie intervenes.  Tami maintains her composure, and I'm wondering why she has such a hard time understanding why people are worried about her behavior. Everyone is finally calm, so Evelyn decides bring up Tasha's head-butting comment.

Tasha tells Evelyn that she didn't mean anything ugly by the comment, and she reminds Evelyn that she aired her husband's dirty laundry in a book without so much as a head's up.  If she is going to be completely honest, Tasha wants to share that she joked with Suzie (oh, she's still there?) about Evelyn wearing a football helmet while dating.  Evelyn immediately turns to Suzie who shrinks back with a "I don't think abuse is funny, but I knew she was just joking" excuse.  Cue Evelyn's tears.  I do actually feel badly, because it's not funny, but I have to wonder why Shaunie's puppet master self felt the need to run to Evelyn with Tasha's comment.