Sex Love and Pain: The Girlfriend vs. The Girl Friend

Dear Et6'ers

First let me start out by saying, RIP Whitney Houston. The death of such a brilliant star has brought me to say a few things before I start with the scheduled topic. Love is very powerful and if its not used in the correct way it can be down right dangerous. Love yourself enough know when you need help, don't let life control you control your life. Addiction is a disease and without help you can and will be killed mentally , spiritually and emotionally by this disease. If anyone you know is struggling with addiction get them help, encourage them to move toward fighting the disease before its too late.

OK, let me wipe my tears and begin focusing on the reason we are all here today, Dirty talk.

Today's topic is..... *drum roll please*...... The Girlfriend vs. The Girl Friend

Relationships are complicated enough with just the fundamental difference between men and women. It leaves you wishing that you had an instruction manual with the do's and don'ts of love. Well until there is such a manual, just use Sex Love and Pain *shameless plug*. The outside world can and will definitely throw all types of curve balls into your love life. The hardest to catch is that of the "Girl Friend".

LADIES I'M GONNA TALK TO Y'ALL FOR A MINUTE SO PLEASE GET A NOT PAD..... (FELLAS DON'T GO TO FAR I NEED Y'ALL IN A FEW)

In my experience with the "Girl Friend" situation. 99.9% of the time the friendship starts as an attraction. One of the parties or both of the parties has felt the attraction for the other. It isn't until one of the involved parties decides that they do not want to pursue the romantic relationship and places the the other in the "friend zone" (Friend Zone: the area of ones life where there is absolutely no chance of sex or romantic involvement)

The "friend zone" SHOULD NOT not be mistaken for a waiting room. PLEASE PAY ATTENTION I SAID THE FRIEND ZONE IS NOT A WAITING ROOM.... #MESSAGE

A very close woman to me has put many men into her friend zone, but she goes in the friend zone and throws them mixed signals. THIS IS ALL THE WAY WRONG... IF YOU PUT SOMEONE IN THE FRIEND ZONE LET THEM STAY THERE AND TREAT THEM APPROPRIATELY.

The problem starts when the "Girl Friend" begins to think that that she is more important and more powerful than the girlfriend.

Example: Girl Friend calls and says "Hey, I'm in Brooklyn (you and your man are in White Plains) my car has broken down, will you come get me?" Him: Im with my girl, so I can't. Her: well I need you cant you drop her off and do it? i'm waiting for you bye. Him: Ok, I'm coming.

This is the point when lines and signals get crossed.

What do you say? what do you do? who are you mad at him or her?

Let me tell what you say do and who the problem is with?

First you address the fact that you have to be dropped off in order for the friend to be picked up. You acknowledge the issue and tell him how you feel. if its uncomfort, if its jeaolousy, if its distrust its its betrayal say it. Say exactly how you feel. If she is a REAL friend she knows you and her place and will respect your union. If she does not respect your union she is not a real friend.

Please understand that communication in this situation is imperative. Every one involved must know their role, play it and respect it. There is no room for a grey area. Clarity is key, you have to speak up, he has to speak up and the "Girl Friend" has to know when to be quiet.

That's the bottom line.

Men, this is where I need you guys to speak up. What are your relationships like between your "Girlfriend" and your "Girl Friends"? email me at Et6jewel@gmail.com I want all the juice, give it to me. "Gimme that funk that sweet that nasty that gushy stuff"

Ladies tell me what you have experienced, what happened what was said "I gotta know what's goin on?" *tiny's voice*

Lets talk its just you and I....

Always remember that "Closed mouths don't get fed and closed legs don't get head!!!!"

Love,

Jewel.