(REALITY TV) LOVE & HIP HOP ATLANTA WEEKLY RECAP

LOVE & HIP-HOP ATLANTA WEEKLY RECAP

Has the season of Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta already flown past us in a flurry of unblinged Rolexes, popcorn hos, no-necks, cabin fever (and flings!), and Joseline Hernandez one-liners?  Sadly, it appears so.  Last night was the season finale, and wow.  I don't know if Stevie J. totally appalls me, or if I should be impressed by his sheer ego induced stupidity.
The episode begins with Stevie asking Joseline to clarify her question.  She spells it out that she is asking him to marry her.  He's not willing to say yes, but he likes the ring so he'll wear it.  Joseline is special to him…and she buys him expensive gifts.  Stevie thinks that patience is a virtue, and Joseline is thrilled that he's kind enough to wear the token of her undying devotion.  Someone get her some self-esteem STAT.
Rasheeda invites Traci Reece, Erica Dixon, and Karlie Redd over for cocktails and nursery painting.  She reveals that she's having a boy…and that she's consulted an attorney about her situation with husband Kirk Frost.  Erica is saddened.  Whose dysfunctional relationship can she look up to now?  Speaking of, Rasheeda asks about Lil' Scrappy and his problem with the wiz-nigh-ee.  
Scrappy Darryl is adjusting to rehab, and VH1 has changed his name accordingly.  While it's not prison, he doesn't want to face this experience as Scrappy.  Darryl will be the one who completes the program.  Momma Dee comes to visit, and he wants to discuss with her his ganja smoking triggers.  The drama among his mother, Erica, and Shay caused him to want to escape reality more so than usual.  Scrappy tells Momma Dee that Erica, regardless of his relationship status with her, will always be part of his family because they have a daughter together.  Dee throws a bit of a fit–she loathes Erica and she never held a joint up to her son's lips, so she takes no responsibility for his actions–but eventually she calms down.  Scrap, er, Darryl, reminds Dee that her kingdom could be really lonely sans prince.

K. Michelle is gathering her friends to share some exciting news.  Since Mimi Faust is still recovering from her boob job, K. is able to invite Joseline to join Erica, Karlie, and Ariane for dinner.  K. Michelle announces that she's moving to New York City, and Joseline waves her left hand to share an engagement ring.  Ariane and Erica are floored…until Joseline explains that the ring she's sporting wasn't a gift, but she did propose to Stevie and the pair are engaged.  She may have exaggerated that last point.  When Ariane makes a comment that it makes more sense to hear that Joseline was the one that popped the question, Joseline fires back that Ariane wouldn't know since she doesn't have a man.  Ariane laughs that she doesn't want one, and all of the ladies, Joseline included, giggle and toast to Ariane's horribly kept secret.
After seeing Benzino's latest video, Stevie feels the need to confront his friend for dissing him.  Benzino is double-talking and back-tracking and apologizing for disrespecting his friend.  No worries, says Stevie.  Keep making that money!  (I'm sure it's a lot).  He appreciates the times Benzino has stuck his neck out for him (sorry, I couldn't resist), so he's willing to let the video be water under the bridge.

Kirk is trying to buy his way back into Rasheeda's good graces.  He pulls up to their house in a new jeep with a bow.  When she's not quick to jump at his apology gift, he starts yelling that she's the one that told him to do him.  Kirk needs to learn how to keep his mouth (and zipper) shut.  All Rasheeda wants is an apology without the qualifications of "well, you said for me to do me."  Here's the thing, Kirk.  You didn't do you.  You did two other women.  At the same time.  While being filmed.  How is this so hard for him to grasp?
Ariane and Erica go check on Mimi and her new rack.  The women want to warn their friend that "Her-man-dez" was in attendance at K. Michelle's girls' night out, and she's claiming to be engaged to Stevie.  Mimi laughs and wishes Joseline the best of luck with Stevie.  She is happy to be rid of him but reveals that he texted her while in Puerto Rico to say she shouldn't believe anything she hears.  Mimi's pals are proud of their friend's progress.
After K. Michelle was able to bring together a normally feuding group of ladies, Karlie wants the singer to make peace with Rasheeda.  After all, it wasn't too long ago that Karlie and K. Michelle at odds until having a very grown-up sit down.  Rasheeda explains to K. Michelle that she sometimes has a big mouth, and that accusation is actually well-received by K.  After an initial dispute, the former friends agree to disagree and wish each other well.

Stevie takes Joseline to Benzino so his friend can grovel over the diss video.  Benzino clearly checked his self-respect at the door because he is kissing Joseline's behind like their is no tomorrow.  He exits stage left, and Joseline starts questioning when they should get married.  Don't worry.  Stevie has something up his sleeve!
Erica goes to visit Darryl in rehab, and he's so proud of himself for being sober.  He's nervous to talk to her without being high.  Darryl promises that if Erica gives him another chance, he'll do his best to make it work.  She puts the engagement ring on the table, and he's happy to see that she didn't real sell it.  She assures him that Momma Dee had very little, if anything, to do with the demise of their relationship.  , Erica doesn't think that the couple can ever stop living in the past.  Poor Scrappy is saddened by her revelation.
Joseline is lured by rose petals and piano playing into a venue rented out by Stevie.  She believes that he's finally going to pop the question to her, but she confused when he's not wearing his ring.  Plus, what is up with the three champagne flutes?  Enter a very top-heavy Mimi.  Stevie begins waxing poetic about how much he loves them both and how they are both his family.  Joseline is fuming, and Mimi is chuckling.  He puts an engagement ring on a befuddled Joseline's finger before turning to Mimi to gift her with a ring as well.  Joseline storms off in tears.  Why doesn't Joseline want to be a part of Stevie's LPG (Life Partner Game)?  The poor production assistant is getting his a$$ beaten in the elevator keeping Joseline from unleashing her wrath on Stevie as Mimi cackles, drinks her champs, and shouts her congratulations.  Way to be the bigger person!  If this was real, I'd feel terribly for the humiliated Joseline.  Thankfully, we all know it's not!

At the season's conclusion, K. Michelle is packing boxes and reliving her time in Atlanta before moving on to New York.  Scrappy promises that his new clarity will impress even the biggest skeptics.  I, for one, am super priz-nigh-oud of Darr-high-el.  He's my fave.  Erica plans to pursue modeling, and Traci is learning to co-parent with Drew.  Rasheeda is looking forward to having her baby and hoping that she'll be able to forgive Kirk and move forward.  Joseline shed some tears over Stevie before realizing that he isn't worth it, and Mimi relishes in her newfound independence.  Stevie is confused…why aren't these ladies more grateful to be graced with his presence?